21 Ways How To Make Him Afraid Of Losing You In (2024)

So, you want to know how to make him afraid of losing you?

Most dating sites will tell you to use manipulative tactics like “flirt with other men in front of him.”

But playing games is not a good basis for a successful long-term relationship.

However, there is a way to make him afraid of using you without manipulation — and that’s by being the best version of yourself possible.

Here are 21 ways to do that.

#1: Learn Good Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship, and it’s an art form. 

This means, like most art forms, most of us are not born with a natural talent for communication. 

Instead, we tend to hog the conversation and think about what we’re going to say next while the other person is talking. 

But the key to good communication is to be a good listener. 

If you listen — really listen — to your partner, he will feel seen, heard, and understood — a recipe for making him worry about losing you.

The other part of good communication is learning how to “fight right.” All couples disagree from time to time, but it’s essential to stay respectful. 

You might want to consider signing up for a non-violent communication course together to learn the art of communication.

#2: Set Boundaries

Some people are afraid to set boundaries with their partner because they think that, if they do, it will push them away.

But actually, the opposite is true.

Setting boundaries is essential for any relationship to go the distance. 

They let your man know what is acceptable to you and what isn’t, so he knows that if he crosses the line, he’ll be at risk of losing you.

Photo by Harrison Haines from Pexels

#3: Don’t Give Up the Things You Love

Sometimes, when people get into a relationship, they can lose themselves in the “couple bubble” and start neglecting the things they love in order to spend time with their new squeeze.

But giving up the things you love is a mistake.

Chances are he fell in love with you for who you are, so don’t stop being that person.

Plus, neediness is not an attractive quality, so maintaining your independence will make you irresistible to him.

#4: Stay Social

For couples, having an active social life is a non-negotiable, but many couples become isolated from their friends over time. 

In fact, people usually lose two (or more) close friends when they start a relationship.

Expecting your partner to be everything to you places too much pressure on him and the relationship.

Instead, aim to find a balance between socializing both together and separately — the time apart will help you appreciate one another more.

#5: Make New Memories Together

Making new memories together is a bonding experience that can bring you closer to one another and strengthen your relationship.

New experiences combat the potential boredom that can set in when you and your man have been together for a long time.

It will also make him associate you with good times, which will make him worry about losing you.

#6: Share Interests

Ideally, a couple should have at least one or two shared interests, but that’s not always the case.

If he loves sports but you’re an antique enthusiast, you may both have to compromise to find some common ground.

Try taking up one of his hobbies or introducing him to one of yours. 

If you’re really stuck, start something totally new together!

#7: Keep Dating Your Partner

Photo by Marcelo Chagas from Pexels

Anyone who’s been in a long-term relationship knows that it’s all too easy to get stuck in a rut!

Once you start to feel comfortable around each other — especially if you live together — the spark can start to fade unless you make an effort.

Set aside at least two days per month to dedicate to dating your man if you feel like he’s losing interest — and make him realize why he started dating you in the first place!

#8: Love Yourself

Loving yourself is not about being selfish. It’s about being the best version of you so you can show up happy and fulfilled in your relationship.

When you love yourself, you fill your own cup first, so you can pour more into your partner and relationship.

It also means fulfilling your own needs so that you don’t depend on your man — remember what we said about being needy?

To most men, there’s nothing more attractive than a man or woman who knows his or her worth and is not afraid to show it.

#9: Support Him 

We all struggle sometimes in life. If you can be there for your man and help him through the hard times, he will never want to let you go. 

If you notice your man is pulling away, the first thing to do is ask him if there’s something on his mind. 

Often, men are conditioned to believe they have to “be strong” and face their problems alone.

Ask him if there’s anything you can help him with. Stay positive and let him know you understand. 

If you can help him overcome his struggles, it will make him worry about losing you.

#10: Ask for What You Want

Many women are afraid to ask for what they want in a relationship, but if they don’t, they can find themselves being taken for granted. 

Letting your man know what you want can make him realize he might lose you if he doesn’t make you happy.

#11: Let Him Be Your Hero

Okay, I know this sounds outdated, but there’s science behind it.

According to relationship psychology, testosterone causes men to feel protective toward their romantic partners.

This so-called “hero’s instinct” makes him want to protect you, and you can nurture that instinct by showing him that he is needed and appreciated.

Ask him for help with things and try to make sure you express your appreciation for all he does — just not too often.

#12: Show Him You Love Him

This might sound obvious, but men want to feel loved. 

What they don’t want is to feel smothered — which is something that can happen when the words “I love you” are overused.

Don’t get me wrong — it’s important to tell your man you love him. 

But it’s even more important to show it.

Showing a guy you love him can look like:

  • Small actions throughout the day that make his life a little easier.
  • Making time for him when he needs you.
  • Giving him a random gift or making his favorite dinner “just because.”
  • Supporting him through difficult times.
  • Spending quality time together.

#13: Be Honest

Honesty is the key to a successful relationship. Without it, you might as well not even bother.

Men appreciate a woman or man who is honest because there are so many flaky, untrustworthy people out there.

Finding an honest one is as rare as winning the lottery — which is how your man will feel when he knows that he can trust you.

#14: Make Time for You

It might sound counterintuitive, but making time for self-care is essential if you want to make your man worry about losing you.

That’s because when you prioritize self-care, you put your own health and wellbeing first. 

And in doing so, you blossom into the best version of yourself you can be — a version that any man in his right mind would fear losing.

Photo by Flora Westbrook from Pexels

#15: Do the Inner Work

No one is perfect — when we enter into a relationship, we bring our baggage with us.

So if you want to make a man worry about losing you, work on cultivating positive traits such as patience, kindness, understanding, affection, and friendliness.

Working on healing your inner child and shadow side so that you don’t continue to play out old patterns in your relationship.

#16: Learn His Love Language

Did you know that there are five love languages, and each of us has a different “native” language?

The five love languages are:

  • Quality time
  • Acts of service
  • Words of affirmation
  • Gifts
  • Physical touch

Often, two people in a relationship have different love languages. 

Fortunately, learning the other person’s love language can smooth misunderstandings between you and lead to a deeper level of love and connection.

#17: Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Everyone has annoying habits. 

Being in a long-term relationship means he has to put up with yours, and you have to put up with his.

If you pick a fight every time he leaves his socks on the floor, he will start to feel unappreciated.

The difference between happy and unhappy couples is the ratio between positive and negative interactions during conflict.

The “magic ratio” is 5:1, which means that for every negative interaction, there should be five (or more) positive interactions.

#18: Give Him Space

Everyone needs alone time, and if you want your man to be afraid of losing you, you should give him space.

Plus, absence makes the heart grow fonder, so when you meet again, he’ll have had the chance to miss you and will be happy to see you.

#19: Accept His Friends

If you can win over your man’s friends, you’ll be a keeper.

A guy doesn’t like to have to choose between his friends and his romantic partner, so if you can integrate into his inner circle, he will worry about losing you.

#20: Show Your Appreciation

It can be easy to take your partner for granted sometimes, especially when you’ve been together for a while. 

Showing your man how much you appreciate him will make him worry about losing you.

#21: Get Physical

And I’m not just talking about sex. 

Hugging makes our bodies produce oxytocin, the “love hormone” that helps us form bonds with one another.

To strengthen your relationship with your guy, aim for a minimum of 6 hugs per day for at least 10 seconds each.

Photo by Gustavo Fring from Pexels

So, there you have my 21 top strategies that will make him worry about losing you.

If, after following these strategies, you still feel your man is taking you for granted, it may be time to ask yourself whether he is worthy of you.

Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

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About The Author

Bijan Kholghi is a certified life coach with the Milton Erickson Institute Heidelberg (Germany). He helps clients and couples reach breakthroughs in their lives by changing subconscious patterns. His solution-oriented approach is based on Systemic- and Hypnotherapy.