TOP 31 Things Guys Like In Bed But Won’t Ask For (2023)

Welcome to your detailed list of things guys like in bed, but won’t ask for.

In my role as a life coach, I am often helping clients improve their romantic relationships.

Intimacy is a big part of that. Yet, a lot of men and women are too shy to ask for what they want in bed. 

This guide aims to help a confident woman introduce more new experiences that their partner might secretly desire. 

Let’s roll!

Things Guys Secretly Love But Won’t Tell You

Here is a list of the top 31 things guys like in bed, but won’t ask for. 

It can be difficult for a shy or insecure man to request these acts in random moments of your relationship. For some men, even talking about intimacy is way outside their comfort zone. However, if you offer a guy something new in bed first, he might feel more comfortable accepting it.

Yes, you should always ask if he wants this new experience first. Not all men find all sexual acts to be a huge turn-on. If you surprise him without his consent, that can lead to some incredibly uncomfortable situations. 

With that said, let’s get into the list. 

Things Guys Like In Bed But Won't Aks For
Photo by Marco Testi on Unsplash

Related: 41 Clear Signs He Wants To Make Love To You

1. Initiate Sex

If you’re the one initiating sex instead of only accepting his initiations, that’ll do a lot to make him feel desired. He’ll love it.

Related Content: Most Creative Ways To Initiate Love-Making

2. Show Some Enthusiasm

Moaning in pleasure. Compliments. Begging for more. Anything to show you’re having fun. 

Most men won’t want to have to tell their woman to do this.

3. Teach Him How To Get You Off  

Most men want to make you orgasm. If you can show your guy how to do that, it’s a win for both of you.

4. Get On Top

Most guys love it when their woman takes the reins on top. But some won’t ask if you don’t initiate this yourself.   

5. Keep The Lights On 

If you’re having sex, this guy thinks you’re a beautiful woman. He’d much rather be able to see what’s going on. 

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6. Talk Dirty   

Many guys like when their woman talks dirty, but it’s kind of uncomfortable for them to ask for it.

7.  Anal Sex

A lot of men love anal sex, but they won’t ask because they know some women find it disgusting.

8. Be His Dominatrix 

A lot of men love the idea of a woman having complete control over them in bed. 

9. Tie Him Up 

This is an extra kink which submissive men will get great pleasure from.

Related Content: My Boyfriend Doesn’t Make Me Feel Wanted Sexually

10. Strip-Tease

Many men would take pleasure in watching you dance and tease while you take your clothes off.

11. Humiliate Him

This is a rarer fetish, but some men find it a turn-on to be insulted or humiliated in bed.

12. Hurt Him

A lot of submissive men find pain a turn-on.

13. Have Sex In Other Parts Of The House

Sex doesn’t just have to take place in bed. You can spice up your love life by having him bend you over the kitchen counter, or giving him a surprise blow job in the shower. At least there, you can guarantee he’ll smell good.

Related: 22 Insights – When A Guy Says He Wants You Sexually

14. Send Nudes

…or at the very least a suggestive text message.

15. Put Your Finger In His Bum 

There’s an erogenous spot there that gives men a lot of pleasure.

16. Deep-Throat Him

Many men love when women do this during oral sex.

17. Play With His Balls 

This is an underrated part of blow jobs, according to many men.

18. Call Him ‘Daddy’

There are a few things you can call him to give him a sense of power. “Daddy” is one of them. “Master” is another one, for obvious reasons.

Related: 21 Reasons Why Do Guys Like Being Called Daddy

19. Let Him Finish In Your Mouth

A lot of men get great pleasure if you choose to swallow instead of spit.

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20. Keep Eye Contact

Many women close their eyes during sex perhaps because they’re shy, or maybe because they’re trying to focus on reaching orgasm. To some guys, this doesn’t matter. But a lot of men really love the intimacy of keeping eye contact during sex.

21. Role Play

Role playing gives men the opportunity to enjoy the fantasies they may never get to enjoy in real life. So, ask what his fantasies are and suggest that you role play this in bed.  

22. Dress Up For Him 

It’s no secret that most guys find lingerie undeniably sexy. But a lot of men have a kink for women wearing a specific costume in bed. This adds to the fun of the role play for them.

23. Tease Him 

It’s a lazy stereotype that men don’t like foreplay. Some men go crazy when you tease them with foreplay instead of getting straight into intercourse. This lets their lust for you build up and often results in a stronger orgasm once you get to it. As a bonus, you might find teased men love to go super-hard once you finally get to it.

24. Watch Porn Together

This is a big turn-on for a lot of guys, and you might even pick up some new positions.

25. Seduce Him In Public 

It’s a great way to make men feel irresistible. You don’t have to try out new sex positions in the park, or do anything where you’re likely to get caught. But a quick hand job in the elevator never hurt anyone. Hand jobs are the safest bet to ensure you don’t get caught.

26. Eat Stuff Off Each Other’s Bodies 

If there are two things men love, it’s food and sex. So, why not combine them during bedroom time? Choose some desserts that smell nice. They’re a safer bet than main courses. 

27. Suggest A New Position

If he’s only having sex with you in the missionary position, it might be that he’s nervous to suggest something else.

Guys really do appreciate when their woman makes the effort to mix things up in bed. Most women leave it to their men to initiate this, then complain that their sex life is getting dull. Don’t be that woman. 

Related Content: Signs You Are Sexually Liberated

28. Introduce An Extra Person 

Threesomes are a bit of a minefield in serious relationships, which is why most guys will never ask for them. They’re an ultimate fantasy for a lot of men though. If you offer to introduce an extra woman, most guys will bite your hand off, no matter who it was. 

The idea of an extra guy is less likely to be a turn-on though.

29. Introduce Sex Toys For Men

Sex toys aren’t just for women. Your man might love the pleasure that sex toys bring too. Most likely, he’s just too embarrassed to buy one. 

30. Make A Spicy Movie Together

A guy might love the idea of filming yourselves in bed together, but this is another of the things men find too extreme to even suggest.

31. Switch Roles When Spooning

Plenty of guys enjoy cuddling after sex – and a lot of them would love if you were the big spoon. However, the mere thought of asking to be the little spoon is likely to spook him, because it’s supposedly not masculine.

Next time you’re finished in bed, surprise him by taking the big spoon position and see how he reacts. 

Related: Effective Tips: How To Be A Better Lover

What Men Want In Bed: Some Final Pointers

Here is some final advice about what guys like in bed.

Things Guys Find Irresistible In Bed 

You now have a huge list of things guys like in bed. To discover what your guy wants more than anything, you usually only have to ask him. 

The more he trusts you, and the more open you are about your own sexuality, the more likely he is to admit what he really wants.

Related Content: Understand The 5 Erotic Blueprints

Things Guys Wants To Hear In Bed 

Sex isn’t just a physical sensation for guys. Men also like to feel desired during sex. They like when women make them feel strong, powerful, sexy and masculine. 

Most guys enjoy it when their woman moans in pleasure during sex or stroke their ego some other way. So, don’t be shy about this sort of thing.

If you have no idea how to talk dirty or say things a guy would like, watch porn for inspiration. There are plenty of helpful dirty talk examples in porn movies. 

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Related: 65 Signs He Wants You Badly Sexually & How To React

Any More Questions About The Things Guys Like In Bed But Won’t Ask For?

I hope you enjoy this guide and that it leads you to the best sex life ever with your partner. 

If you have any questions about this topic or you’d like to list other things that men want in bed but won’t ask for, leave a comment below.  

You don’t have to be a sex and relationship expert to comment. It would be great to hear from you, whether you’re a man or a woman.