“All men just want sex.”
This is one of the most common statements you’ll hear women make.
However, it’s not always true. While there are tons of men who just want to have sex and leave, there are those looking for more intimate connections—men looking to make love to you rather than just sex.
But how do you know he wants to make love and not just have meaningless sex?
We answer that in this article. In this article, we discuss 41 clear signs he wants to make love to you.
Here’s what you’ll learn.
But before we get into the signs, let’s understand the difference between making love and having sex.
What is the Difference Between Making Love and Having Sex?
Both sex and making love are forms of physical intimacy.
Sex is an act of indulging in erotic pleasure. Sex is basically two people connecting physically—no need for an emotional connection.
Animals have sex. It doesn’t take emotions to have sex.
Making love, on the other hand, takes more than a physical connection. When you make love, you and your partner connect physically and emotionally. When making love, your man communicates their love using non-verbal cues.
However, unlike sex which is an experience that can be shared with anyone (notwithstanding if you love them or not), making love is an experience that can only be shared with someone you love.
Now that you know the difference between making love and having sex, let’s get into the telltale signs he wants to make love to you.
Signs He Wants to Make Love to You
#1. Drops Small Hints
One of the first signs that a man wants to make love to you but is too shy to say is that he’ll start dropping small hints.
He’ll start turning harmless conversations into flirty messages. On a cold morning, he’ll wake up and text you that he wishes he was next to you. If you’re going to the shower, he might jokingly ask if he can join you.
If you notice your man giving you such hints, a high possibility is that he wants to make love to you.
#2. Compliments You Rather than Flirt with You
A man that only wants to have sex with you will only flirt with you. His compliments aren’t sincere and mainly come out as flirting.
However, a man that wants to make love to you gives you honest compliments. He just doesn’t tell you that you’re beautiful. He’ll describe what aspect of your face he finds most intriguing.
If it’s your eyes, he’ll tell you. If it’s your smile, he’ll describe it.
A man who wants to make love to you will make you feel like you’re the most beautiful woman on earth.
If a man does this, together with other signs in this article, it’s a clear sign that he wants to make love to you.
#3. Eyes You Up
Does your man look at you like a favorite piece of art? One that’s priceless and should be treasured and protected from any harm.
If so, this man wants to make love to you.
A man that wants to make love to you will have his eyes on you at all times – not in a creepy type of way but in a nice way.
Even in a room full of people, you’ll always catch him looking at you.
So if you’re at a party and you catch your man looking at you seductively several times, then you know what’s on his mind.
#4. Finds Excuses to Touch You
What do you do when you want to subtly hint that you like a guy? On most occasions, you’ll find excuses to touch him. Right?
Well, when a man wants to make love to you, he’ll always find an excuse to touch you.
It could be anything from hugging you a bit tighter and longer, placing his hand on your thigh when you guys are talking, or holding your waist when hugging or kissing you.
#5. Puts in the Work
You’ve probably met several of them.
Men who only text you when inviting you for a party or only when it’s convenient for them.
Such men are after one thing.
However, a man who wants to make love to you will put in the work to connect with you emotionally. He’s not the type of person to ghost you and call you when it’s convenient.
A man who wants to make love with you will put effort into being in your life. No matter the hurdles, he’ll work hard to ensure you create an emotional connection by always being there for you.
Putting in an effort could also mean taking the time to plan dates that you’ll enjoy. Not inviting you to his place for the first date.
#6. Plans Date Nights at Home
You can’t make love at a restaurant or movie theatre.
At one point, you’ll have to go to his place.
If you notice your man asking to have a home-cooked dinner date after several dates, that’s a clear sign that he wants to make love to you.
If he puts in the work and makes a romantic dinner, this is a man who’s not looking to just have sex with you but wants to make love to you.
#7. Nobody’s at Home When You Visit Him
Even though you already know that his invitation to his place is a sign he wants to make love to you, another clear indication is that nobody else is at his home when you get there.
If he has a roommate, he’s not there.
If you notice such when you visit your man, he probably wants to make you moan in a really good way.
#8. He Tries to Set the Mood When you Visit Him
When you go for the date at home, you might notice him playing sexually themed music and movies. This is a clear sign he wants to make love to you.
By playing sexually themed content, he’s looking to get you in the mood for love making before he makes his move.
#9. His Bed and Bedroom are Always Neat
In preparation for making love to you, your man will take the extra effort to prepare his lair for you.
When you visit him, you might notice that of all rooms in the house, the bedroom is the neatest, with his bed perfectly made.
If you notice this, this is a clear sign that he wants to make love to you.
#10. Talks About His Body
If a man wants to make love to you, he’ll try to send you hints that he’s fit and good in bed.
He might mention how he hits the gym or how he has an incredible body. By doing this, he’s hinting that he’s capable of giving you immense pleasure if you give him a chance.
He may send you an after-gym photo just to show you what to expect.
#11. Lingerie talk
Has your man ever told you that you’d look sexy in lingerie or a sexy bra that you guys have seen at a cloth store?
If so, he’s imagined you in the lingerie, thought how seductive you’d look in it, and has gone further to picture you two having a great time thanks to the lingerie.
#12. Puts an Effort to Dress
Most men don’t put much effort into their dressing.
However, if a man likes you and wants to make love to you, he’ll put an effort to dress up for you. Just like you would for him.
A man who wants to make love to you will:
- Wear cologne
- Get new footwear
- Gel up his hair
- Wear sexy eyeglasses when meeting up
- Put extra effort to wear some bling or watch.
#13. Talks in a Low-Pitched Voice
You’ve probably noticed this in movies.
When a male character meets a female character, he’ll change his voice to a low-pitched one.
However, it doesn’t only happen in movies.
Researchers suggest that both men and women use low-pitched voices to indicate arousal when speaking to someone they are attracted to.
So, if you notice that your man has changed his voice and is talking in a low-pitched voice, it’s a clear sign that he’s aroused by you and would like to make love to you.
#14. Doesn’t Mind Taking It Slow
This sign will provide a clear distinction of whether he just wants to have sex or wants to make love to you.
A man who just wants to have sex with you will be hasty to get you to his bed. If you’re dating such a man, this is a red flag that he just wants to get laid.
However, a man who wants to make love to you understands that slow and steady wins the race.
He invests his time until you’re ready to make love.
And when it gets to making love, he isn’t in a hurry. He takes his time to explore the marvel that is your body.
#15. Replies to Your Texts Fast
The foundation of a relationship is effective communication between parties. Whether you want to stop your partner from cheating or are looking for a sign that he truly loves you, communication is a major indicator.
The same goes for when a man wants to make love to you.
He’ll always communicate. If it’s on text messages, he replies to your texts fast. He also texts you often, sometimes out of the blue.
If you notice your man replying to your texts faster, he’s probably building up a connection that’ll lead to lovemaking.
Related: Understand The 5 Erotic Blueprints
#16. Acts Like a Hero
A man that wants to make love to you will always act like your hero.
While not like an Avenger-type of hero, this man will do his best to step up. He will always be there to help whenever he can.
Relationship psychologists have referred to this phenomenon as a hero instinct that’s triggered when a man likes you.
If you notice him projecting a hero complex, high chance he wants to make love to you.
#17. He’s Not Afraid to Kiss You or Hold your Hand in Public
A man who wants to make love to you isn’t afraid of showing how he feels about you in public.
He isn’t scared of being seen with you in public. He’s not afraid to kiss or hold your hand in public.
If you notice that your man isn’t ashamed of being seen with you in public and displays affection publicly, high chances are that he wants to make love to you
#18. His Body Language
While he might be too shy to speak out his mind, his body language could be speaking tons.
Just look at how a man looks at you.
When talking, does he seem to lean closer to you? Is he always looking at you with seductive eyes? Is he always staring at your cleavage, or does his gaze linger around your thighs?
If you notice several of these signs in your man, there is a high chance he wants to make love to you.
#19. Asks You about your Intimate Life
If your man starts asking you about what turns you on in bed and what you like in bed, there’s a high chance he wants to make love to you.
He might go ahead and ask a bit about what turns you off in a bid to avoid making a mistake when the time comes.
By asking you about your intimate life, he’s trying to tell you that he’d like to be part of it.
#20. Offers to Massage You
This is seduction 101.
Unless he’s studying to be a massage therapist, offering to give you a massage should be a clear sign that he wants to make love to you.
This is because a massage offers an introduction to intimacy and touching, leading to lovemaking.
So before accepting a massage, be sure you also want to make love to this man.
#21. Tells Sexual Jokes
Once you’re already comfortable and are done with the ice-breaking phase of your relationship, a man may start sneaking in sexual jokes and other innuendos into conversations.
And these jokes come in all forms. Some are subtle, some are creepy, some are in your face, and some will be hot.
He may suggest that rather than going out, you come over and you guys “Netflix and Chill.” On certain occasions, he might suggest joining you in the shower.
If you notice such jokes coming up in the conversation, he’s probably hinting that he’s ready to make love to you.
#22. Switches His Video Game for You
I once came across a TikTok trend where women tried to see what their boyfriends would do if they walked in the room naked. In all the videos, the men stopped what they were doing (playing video games), and their focus shifted to the woman.
This is what happens to a man’s brain when he wants to make love to you.
He’ll lose focus whenever you’re around.
If he was playing a video game, he will switch it off and give you his full attention (and we all know how hard it is to get these men away from their gaming screens.
#23. You’ll Know it By How He Kisses You
How does he kiss you?
Are they brief or long kisses? A man that wants to make love to you will give you kisses for long periods.
He won’t rush to undress you but will take his time kissing your lips and all over your body. A man that wants to make love to you will enjoy kissing you.
#24. Is Considerate of Your Needs
Here’s another difference between a man who wants to have casual sex and one who wants to make love to you.
A man who wants to have casual sex with you will always put his needs first and never consider your needs.
However, as mentioned earlier, a man that wants to make love to you takes his time. He considers your needs and always makes sure you’re comfortable.
If you notice that your man always considers your needs, especially when kissing and making out, this is a clear sign that he wants to make love to you and not just have sex.
#25. Tells you His Fantasies
A man that wants to make love to you will be willing to share his bedroom fantasies.
Sharing sexual fantasies is a deeply vulnerable process, and few people are willing to do it.
However, if your man tells you about what he wants in the bedroom, this is a clear indication that he’s thinking of making love to you.
#26. Tells You why He Thinks You’re Beautiful
It’s one thing for someone to tell you that you’re beautiful. But it’s a whole different thing when he details why he thinks you’re gorgeous.
A man who wants to make love to you won’t be generic with his compliments. If it’s your smile that fascinates him, he’ll tell you. If it’s your eyes that marvel him, he’ll let you know.
If you notice a guy telling you exactly why he thinks you’re beautiful, he’s probably in love with you, and someone in love wants to make love to you.
#27. He Listens to You
A man that wants to make love to you listens to you with intent.
Whether it’s when talking about your boring workmate or describing what you want in bed, he listens and puts your suggestions into action.
If he wants to make love to you, he’ll ask you and encourage you to be honest and open with him.
If he’s been asking what you like, has been listening intently, and doesn’t judge or laugh at you, he clearly wants to make love to you.
#28. He’s Not Afraid to Emotionally Connect with You
As mentioned in the earlier section, making love entails two people connecting physically and emotionally.
So, if a man is showing genuine interest in your life and hobbies, shows you respect, and works to earn your trust every day, he’s building an emotional connection with the hope of making love to you.
#29. He Shows Affection in and Out of the Bedroom
Let’s say you guys have been having sex, but you’re unsure if he’s there for the sex or if he’s making love to you.
How do you differentiate?
If he’s affectionate to you in and out of the bedroom.
Does he jokingly slap your butt? Does he hold your hand? Is he open to cuddling on the couch?
Making love isn’t only about sex. It also entails simple everyday acts of affection.
If he shows affection in and out of the bedroom, he wants to keep making love to you.
#30. He’s Willing to be Vulnerable with You
Whether male or female, it’s hard to be vulnerable. However, it’s especially harder for men to be vulnerable.
A man that’s willing to share his struggles and issues with you is a man that loves you. He doesn’t consider you a fling.
If you notice your man being more vulnerable with you, high chances are that he wants to make love with you.
#31. You Can See it in His Eyes
They say the eyes are the windows to the soul.
If someone is happy, you’ll see it in their eyes. If he wants to make love with you, you’ll see it in his eyes. ‘
In most instances, he’ll be looking at you like a nice piece of eye candy (not in a creepy way)
If you notice a glare in his eyes whenever he sees you or you notice him looking at you with a sultry gaze, high chances are he wants to make love to you.
#32. He Shows His Craving for You
Ever heard of the term “simping?” If not, it’s an urban slang that describes a behavior where someone does way too much for someone they like.
While it’s considered annoying and pathetic, a man who wants to make love to you exhibits a certain level of simping.
If he wants to make love to you, he may appear to be too available for you. He might even go as far as booking a staycation to spend more time with you.
#33. He’s Jealous of Other Guys Around You
A man that’s emotionally interested in you will be jealous of other guys attracted to you.
In most cases, a man that wants to make love to you will be possessive of you.
However, by being possessive, I don’t mean someone that prevents you from hanging with your male friends.
If you notice him getting a bit mad when you go partying with your male friends or go on a date with a male friend, he probably wants to make love to you.
#34. Goes Out of His Way to Spend Time with You
In a bid to create an emotional connection with you, a man that wants to make love to you will want to spend lots of time with you.
To do this, he might go out of his way, including booking a weekend away with you or spending a holiday with you as opposed to his family.
#35. Relationship Talk Turns Him On
Any talk about relationships will turn off a guy that just wants to have sex with you.
He’s just there for fun and isn’t ready for commitment.
However, someone that wants to make love to you won’t switch off when you mention relationships.
He’s probably thought about and you bringing up the idea is simply God-sent.
#36. He Always Wants You to Be His Plus One
Is there a man in your life that always invites you to parties as his plus one?
Such a guy could be giving a sign that he wants to make love to you.
When someone invites you as their plus one, it’s a clear sign that they like you.
If you’re always his plus one, he likes you and hopes one of these events could lead to the two of you making love.
#37. He’s Proud of You and Wants to Show You Off
This is one of the most obvious signs that a man loves you.
If a man wants to make love to you, he’ll be proud of you and won’t mind showing you off to his friends. He might even go ahead and introduce you to his friend.
A man that just wants to have casual sex with you won’t like to show you off or introduce you to their friends.
#38 He Calls Occasionally Just to Know How You’re Doing
If a man likes you, he will want to be in constant communication with you.
So, if you notice that he calls you out of the blue just to know how your day is going, a high chance he likes you and wants to make love to you.
#39. Is Interested in What You Have to Say
As mentioned earlier, a man who wants to make love to you will give you his undivided attention.
When talking to someone that wants to make love to you, he won’t be on his phone or won’t be focused on the TV. If he wants to make love to you, he’ll be glued on every word you say.
Unlike someone that just wants to have sex, then leave. For such a man, he’ll switch off the moment a topic doesn’t interest him.
Half the time you’re talking, he won’t be listening.
#40. Acts Like a Perfect Gentleman
Another sign he wants to make love to you is that he always acts like a perfect gentleman.
He exhibits confidence when with you, isn’t afraid to take charge, pulls back the chair for you, and always opens the door.
Just like a perfect gentleman.
He also respects you and your decisions.
If you notice a man acting like a perfect gentleman (nowadays, there are very few of these), high chances he wants to make love with you.
#41. He Doesn’t Insist on Having Sex with You
One of the best distinctions between a man who wants to have casual sex with you and one who wants to make love to you is that, the one who just wants to have sex will switch off the minute you put sex off the table.
However, a man that wants to make love to you won’t insist on having sex with you. He’ll respect your decision and will wait until you’re ready.
While he may exhibit other signs in this article, he won’t push you to have sex.
And if you decide to have sex with him, how do you know he’s making love to you?
How Do You Know if a Man is Making Love to You?
You can use several signs to know if a man is making love to you or if he’s using you for an easy lay.
One of the most common signs is that when he’s making love to you, there are many intimate moments. He’ll make eye contact, take his time, and won’t put you down for being awkward in bed.
He’ll also want to cuddle and hold some deep conversation after sex.
If you notice such behaviors in your man, he’s making love to you.
How Does a Man Act When He’s Falling in Love?
Most of the signs explained in this article are also the signs that a man is falling in love with you.
A man that wants to make love to you is probably in love with you.
Some other signs to look out for include
- He becomes romantic
- He softens up to you
- Makes you a priority
To learn more about the signs of true love in a man, check out our article here.
How Do You Tell a Man You Want Him to Make Love to You?
Unlike men, it’s a bit harder for women to verbalize their needs and wants.
However, if you notice that he’s too shy to ask you to make love to him and decide to take the step, here’s what you can do.
- Dress to attract and fascinate him
- Create the mood with romantic music
- Give subtle hints
- Straight-up ask him
Any Further Questions?
There you go.
Forty-one clear signs that he wants to make love to you. Have you noticed your man exhibiting some of these signs?
Do you have any questions regarding signs that he wants to make love to you? Do you know of any other signs?
Please tell us in the comment section below.