161 Best Questions For Married Couples (2021)

9 min read

The more we talk to each other, the more we will know about each other. Relationships rely on communication.

Questions for couples are powerful tools, so they need to be used with precision and care. It’s not just the questions you ask, but the way you use them.

Small talk gets boring fast, these 161 best questions for married couples will spice up your date night with some fun and help you find answers to possibly improving your own relationships.

Let’s dive right into it.

Questions For Married Couples
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Questions To Ask Married Couples

Maybe your parents have their 50th wedding anniversary coming up and you want to record their history, or there’s a married couple you know, admire and see as a role model that can give good advice for your own marriage.

I love how these fun questions to ask for married couples encourage us to be deliberate and reflective in our engagements with our partners while keeping it fun.

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They’re guaranteed to start a more interesting conversation than what you had planned for dinner, that’s for sure!

Fun questions to ask for married couples will help you find out all you need to know and may help you reap the benefits of their hard-earned wisdom.

  1. What do you feel is the secret to making a marriage work for a lifetime?
  2. How do you make finances work?
  3. Is arguing normal?
  4. How do you successfully balance work/home life?
  5. How did you decide to split up holidays?
  6. How did you figure out a balance with household chores?
  7. Did you create boundaries to protect your marriage?
  8. What’s the story of how you met?
  9. What were your first impressions of your partner?
  10. What did you do on your first date night?
  11. What were your main methods of communication then?
  12. How did you know things were getting serious?
  13. What did your family’s think of your new boyfriend or girlfriend?
  14. When did you know you would end up getting married?
  15. Do you have an engagement story?
  16. What was something unexpected that happened at your wedding?
  17. What was the most special part of your wedding?
  18. What traditions from your family of origin did you bring into your marriage?
  19. What traditions did you start together?
  20. How have you celebrated your anniversaries?
  21. How have you celebrated Valentine’s Day?
  22. How has Christmas has worked for you as a couple, including how it has changed over time?
  23. How did you decide whether you wanted to live in the city or the country?
  24. What has been the most challenging time during your relationship and what did you learn about each other?
  25. Do you make time for each other, like a date night?
  26. How was your partnership strengthened by these experiences?
  27. Looking back, is there anything you wish you’d handled differently?
  28. How have you dealt with conflict in your relationship?
  29. Has how you’ve dealt with conflict changed over time?
  30. What world events had an impact on your marriage?
  31. How have changes in technology impacted your relationship?
  32. Do you think what it means to be a good spouse has changed over the time you’ve been together?
Questions Married Couples
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Thought Provoking Questions For Married Couples

If your conversation is growing a bit stale, ask your spouse these fun questions for couples that are thought provoking. They’re great questions for shaking things up and keeping things fresh (the questions can certainly apply to your engaged or dating partner, too).

Ask your spouse these fun questions for couples and you’ll never run out of things to talk about! You’ll discover a whole lot more about the person you love.

  1. What are you most excited about in our relationship during this season?
  2. What are your biggest fears and joys about our relationship?
  3. If you had three wishes granted, without any obstacles like money, for our future, what would they be?
  4. What are three places within 200 miles that you would like to spend a few days?
  5. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
  6. What makes you feel the most peaceful?
  7. What strengths do I bring to our relationship?
  8. Do you feel more emotionally connected than we did early in our relationship?
  9. What have you learned to appreciate about me that you didn’t know early in our marriage?
  10. Do you believe in spirits or the metaphysical? 
  11. Have you ever had a metaphysical experience? 
  12. If you could ask a deceased family member one question, who would you ask and what would you like to ask them?
  13. When you think of home, what do you imagine?
  14. If you could bring one family pet back to life, which one would you like to choose?
  15. What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
  16. If you could live in any era what would you choose?
  17. What is the best gift you’ve ever been given?
  18. What’s something you’ve done that most people wouldn’t know or guess about you?
  19. Do you believe in an afterlife?
  20. Have you ever experienced something that you have no explanation for?
  21. If someone gave you an envelope with your death date inside of it, would you open it?
  22. How do you think the world came into existence?
  23. What’s your biggest regret?
  24. What is your greatest achievement?
  25. Were you close to your parents growing up?
  26. What was the most life-changing event you’ve ever experienced?
  27. What were the 3 happiest days of your life?
  28. What is your biggest flaw?
  29. What do you love most about yourself?
  30. Have you ever had a falling out with a friend? What happened?
  31. What’s the biggest trouble you’ve ever been in? 
  32. Do you believe that pure happiness exists? Have you ever felt it?
  33. What’s the most important thing I should know about you?
  34. Have you ever had your heart broken?
  35. What song do you want to be played at your funeral?
  36. Would you rather live to be 100 with many regrets or live just 20 more years with absolutely no regrets?
  37. What legacy do you/would you want to leave for your kids? If no kids, younger members of your family?
  38. Do you feel like you’re living your best life? If not, what could you be doing to change that? How could I help you?
  39. Why do you think we’ve been put here on earth? Do you think life has a purpose?
  40. If you could make one change to the world before you die, what would it be?
  41. What does love mean to you?

Questions To Ask Your Spouse To Improve Your Marriage

As your relationship matures, the questions that get you both talking should become more intentional, and your skills at asking them need to be honed. If you’re asking the same questions you did in the beginning, it’s tough to move your relationship forward.

Questions that strengthen relationships aren’t primarily about gaining information; they’re about gaining understanding. Information makes us more knowledgeable; understanding makes us more connected.

Seeing things through your spouse’s eyes enables you to see his or her heart. These are fun questions for couples that can help you understand each other better.

  1. If you could see two things to change about me, what would they be?
  2. What ways can I honor you more?
  3. As your spouse, how can I show more love/sensitivity to you?
  4. Are you dealing with anything that I can help you with currently?
  5. What are a few ways I could be more understanding?
  6. What are a few ways you desire to see our finances improve?
  7. What ways can I improve as your husband/wife?
  8. What do I need to know most about you right now?
  9. Would you rather have the ability to fly or the ability to be invisible?
  10. If you had just one last meal, what would you choose to eat?
  11. What couples movie best describes us?
  12. What are your pet peeves?
  13. Do you worry about our relationship? What would make you feel more secure?
  14. Do you prefer surprises (like on anniversaries) or making plans together?
  15. What do you wish for our relationship?
  16. What scares you about money?
  17. Where do you see us 5 years in the future? 10 years?
  18. What do you think is the biggest myth about relationships?
  19. What do I do that irritates you?
  20. What do you admire most about me?
  21. Are you satisfied with the amount of time we spend together?
  22. Do I tell you I love you enough?
  23. What ways can we build our relationship more?
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Romantic Questions For Married Couples

Even if you think you know every story, quirk, and foreplay move they’ve got, there are always new things to learn about your husband or wife.

Questions for married couples to keep your marriage feeling fresh, are great ideas because our wants and needs evolve over the years. You’re each a different person now than when you were married.

These fun questions to ask your spouse are more intimate, romantic, thought-provoking yet fun questions for married couples.

They can be a fun way to bond on a date night, and check in with each other’s vision for what the future might hold.

  1. What movie always makes you cry?
  2. Which of our marriage vows do you think is the most important? (Or if you’re not married, which marriage vow would be most important to you?)
  3. What were some fun things we used to do before we were married that you miss now?
  4. Is there a favorite couple you know that you really look up to?
  5. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done to impress a crush?
  6. Tell me about your first crush. 
  7. What’s your relationship deal-breaker?
  8. How can we improve our intimacy or take it to the next level?
  9. What’s your dream date night or weekend with me?
  10. What’s your favorite memory of me? Multiple memories welcome!
  11. What’s your favorite part of my body?
  12. What’s something that we’ve never tried in bed that you would like us to try?
  13. What part of your body do you most prefer to be touched? 
  14. Tell me about a mistake you made in a previous relationship, or something you regret.
  15. What would be the best gift I could give you?
  16. What makes you feel better when you’re sad or stressed?
  17. What would you prefer as the perfect afternoon to spend with me? 
  18. What is the most romantic movie you’ve ever seen?
  19. What’s one thing that you think would make our relationship better?
  20. What do you think is the biggest cause of or contributing factor towards divorce?
  21. Has our relationship had any effect on your spirituality?
  22. Has it changed since we’ve been together?
  23. Do you have a “type,” or did you have one before we got together?
  24. What is the most fun you’ve ever had with me?
  25. What’s your top three favorite love songs and why?
  26. ***What song reminds you of me?
  27. What is the glue that keeps couples together?
  28. Are you ever jealous of something about me? 
  29. What makes you feel the most loved?
  30. If you could change something about me, what would it be?
  31. What do you think would be the most romantic trip for us to travel to?
  32. Do you believe in soulmates?
  33. When did I make you laugh the most?
  34. When did your parents talk to you about the birds and the bees?
  35. What is your greatest dream?
Married Couples Questions
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Funny Questions To Ask Married Couples

Never let the conversation run dry on your next date night. Have some silly, fun questions ready to ask your spouse. These are questions to laugh and lighten the mood while getting to know more about each over dinner with good food and wine. 

So these are some ideas of fun questions for couples on a date night.

  1. What’s the most ridiculous nickname you’ve ever been given in the past?
  2. If animals could talk, which one would be the biggest jerk?
  3. If you could read one person’s mind, whose would it be and why?
  4. What is the most fun you’ve had with your best friend growing up?
  5. If you were part of the circus, what job would you want? 
  6. What is the weirdest food you have ever eaten, or what food would you be open to eating?
  7. What would make you lose on Fear Factor?
  8. Would you rather fight a tiger or a shark?
  9. Would you rather be teeny tiny or a massive giant?
  10. Would you rather be able to talk to your dog or have your dog talk to you? (One choice only)
  11. Would you rather wear the same socks for a month or the same underwear for a week?
  12. Would you rather take a trip to the country or the city? With just me or with friends?
  13. Would you rather be the smartest or the funniest person in the room?
  14. What’s your favourite childhood memory?
  15. What is the earliest thing you remember?
  16. How did you get to school when you were little?
  17. What was your connection to your childhood pet like?
  18. What outfit did your parents force you to wear that you hated?
  19. What was the worst haircut or hairstyle you ever had?
  20. What was the naughtiest thing you ever did as a child?
  21. What would you prefer, have so much money, like a billionaire or have an endless supply of knowledge?
  22. Describe your perfect weekend.
  23. Describe your perfect date.
  24. What toy was your absolute favorite as a child?
  25. Who is your celebrity crush?
  26. Who was your celebrity crush as a teenager?
  27. What is your dream home like?
  28. What possession do you treasure most of all?
  29. Who is the black sheep in your family?
  30. Who is the angel who can do no wrong? 

The goal of our questions for married couples isn’t to show who’s right. It’s to build trust between each other, which comes through compassion. 

Use these practical ideas to make sure your questions strengthen your relationship:

  • Ask one question at a time. To encourage deeper discussions, make sure the questions to ask are open-ended rather than questions that can be answered with yes or no.
  • Don’t interrupt or defend yourself while your spouse is talking. Your only goal is to hear your husband or wife completely.
  • Listen just to understand, not to formulate your reply.
  • Explore your spouse’s thoughts by asking a deeper follow-up question. It shows that you’re listening and takes the conversation to another level. But don’t add questions that take the conversation in a new direction.
  • Tell your spouse you want to think through what he or she said, and that you’ll come back later with your thoughts.

By taking time to ask questions this way demonstrates you’re more interested in hearing your spouse’s perspective than correcting it.

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This builds trust, which opens the door to even more effective conversation in the future.
Let us know if you found value ✅ in these fun questions for couples and post your comments. Try them out on a date night and forward this to friends and family to spark their conversation with deeper questions for married couples.

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