People often interchange marriage coaching and marriage counseling, however, these two have significant differences.
Although both of these approaches improve the relationship between the couple, their difference lies in the perspective.
Let’s dive right into it.
- The Difference Between Marriage Coaching And Counseling
- What Are The Benefits Of Coaching?
- How Do I Prepare For Marriage Coaching?
- What Are The Benefits Of Counseling?
- What Does A Marriage Coach Do?
- What Questions Does A Marriage Coach Ask?
- How Do I Know I’m Marrying The Right Person?
- How Can I Fix My Marriage?
- Is Marriage/ Relationship Coaching Successful?
- How Much Does Marriage Coaching Cost?
Coaching focuses on a couple’s present problems and defines their behaviors which will be the key to achieving their goals.
With coaching, the couple will be able to understand each other and make decisions that will move their relationship forward.
A marriage coach does not tell you how to fix your relationship but he will make you realize the right way to do it by asking the right questions.
Often, a coach will ask “How” questions to incite change between a couple.
On the other hand, marriage counseling focuses more on the couple’s past and how it hinders their present relationship. Counseling also dwells and digs on the root causes of one’s deficiencies or illnesses.
It analyzes everything that happened in the past.
A marriage counselor is primarily the driving force of change as he will be the one to define the objectives in the process. Usually, counseling is a long-term process as compared to coaching.
Still having problems differentiating the two?
Basically, marriage coaching is strengthening a couple’s relationship by helping to improve communication between the two.
On the other hand, marriage counseling is for couples who need external help in identifying the root causes of why they keep having problems.
There are several benefits to coaching, but the main benefit that a coach provides is helping you actively move towards your goal.
If you are feeling stuck in life, in your career, or in your relationship, a coach could help you move past these obstacles.
Here are just a few other benefits that a coach could provide:
- Allow you to become more independent and give you the skills to be self-reliant.
- View events from a different perspective and feel more fulfilled.
- Become a better team player and communicate more effectively.
- Become more of a solution-oriented individual who does not blame problems on others.
- Help with confidence in yourself as a lover, leader, and/or friend.
The exact benefits that a coach provides to you differ on a case by case basis.
This is great news because a powerful coach tailors each session to each client. If you are already a confident individual, but you need help crafting a road map to your goals, the coach should adhere to that.
Coaching comes with an up-front investment, but the skills you gain from coaching can be invaluable.
The number of people whose lives have been greatly changed by coaching grows by the day, and many swear by the positive outcomes.
Preparing for coaching is a serious commitment.
Marriage coaches can be expensive and can be a very emotional experience.
Preparing for coaching is similar to preparing for any type of coaching – it is important to take preparation seriously if you want to have good results.
Visualize The Outcome
What do you want the marriage to look like after these coaching sessions?
Do you want the marriage dynamics to return to a certain time period?
Is there something that has always bothered you that you absolutely need to address?
The more you visualize the exact outcome, the more you can supply your coach with information. As with any goal, the more you are able to define it, the harder it is to miss it.
Go into the session with an open mind.
You would be surprised how many people enter a coaching session hoping that they hear affirmations of what they already believe.
Go into it knowing that all of you are working together against the problem.
You are there for a reason. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.
Expect change because with change comes growth.
The benefits of counseling far outweigh the costs.
Counseling can help you reframe your perspective and equip you with tools to handle any obstacle.
- If you are left alone with a problem, the problem can start to appear larger than it is. Through counseling, you have someone who can see the problem from an unbiased third-party perspective. This is a powerful service that can help you understand the problems better and therefore craft more potent solutions.
- Going to counseling forces you to set aside time to grapple with your problems. As your mental state worsens, actually confronting issues can become more and more difficult. By committing to counseling sessions, you are taking that first step and guaranteeing that these issues will not be set aside. This is a powerful action that can begin to produce results immediately.
- Sharing the weight of your emotions. There are several studies that show even speaking about your problems can help you cope with them. When was the last time you just spoke about your heavy burdens for an hour and had someone’s full attention? It is a powerful feeling that can help you sort through what you are feeling and why.
By speaking your issues, your problems exist somewhere outside of your head and there is a newfound belief that the solutions may also exist out there as well.
A marriage coach has only two jobs.
The first job is to find the root of the problems, and the second is to then eliminate them.
The first few sessions will be an investigatory period where the coach will ask questions and learn about the marriage dynamics.
Coming in with an open mind and being vulnerable will speed this process up considerably.
Remember that it is the coach’s job to listen to different issues in marriages – no matter how embarrassing or crazy you think your problems are, the coach has seen worse!
After the marriage coach listens to the anxieties and grievances of the couple, the coach will change gears and start to experiment.
There will be deeper questions that can help couples understand what triggers these unhealthy cycles.
There will also be suggestions on possible exercises that the couple can do to avoid arguments and stress. However, this entire process is a process of experimenting and testing.
Did you apply this technique?
How did it feel?
Do you notice improvement?
Okay, let’s try this.
Marriage coaches closely monitor the problems and progress of each couple and work to remove the problems that exist within a relationship.
Going to a marriage coach can cause a bit of anxiety.
You are about to enter into a room with a complete stranger and reveal some of the most intimate aspects of your life.
Here are a few questions that the marriage coach may ask about your relationship:
- What are the things that are holding back this marriage? What are the largest problems that you face?
- How long have been these problems persisted? When did they start? Why did they start then?
- What do you love most about your partner? Why do you love that aspect?
- Do you trust your partner? If not, what has caused you to lose that trust?
- Why have you come to marriage counseling? What do you want your marriage to look like after marriage counseling?
- Are you satisfied with your sex life?
- What are some things you need for this marriage to be healthy and functional?
These questions will all give the coach enough information to start trying out exercises and techniques that could slowly mend the relationship.
It should be noted that the list is not comprehensive, but as long as you are open to coaching and ready to be vulnerable you will do absolutely fine!
Marriage is a life-long commitment. With the rate of divorces going up, there are many that forget this aspect.
Marriage is a promise that you two will be faithful for the rest of your lives, it’s just that there are many couples nowadays that break this promise.
With a commitment as serious as this, how can you be sure that your partner is the right one for you? This is an extremely difficult question, but it is best to work back from the premise.
Marriage is a life-long journey, could you imagine it with your partner? Could you imagine it with only your partner? There are several obstacles that you may face on this journey.
Could you depend on your partner even in financially difficult times?
Are you two able to stay strong even during emotional hardships?
The problem with these questions is that you can never know for certain.
However, what you can do is have a candid look at the past time with your partner and see if you are fairly confident about all of these answers.
If you are not confident, perhaps it’s time to find a new partner or spend a bit more time getting to know him/her.
Fixing a marriage has no one size fits all solution.
The first step of fixing a marriage is finding out what has broken the marriage.
In some cases, it is very easy to diagnose – for example, if you were caught cheating or being unfaithful.
In other cases, the coldness and awkwardness seem to have slowly crept into the relationship before either of you noticed.
It is important to truly focus on where the marriage started to falter so that you can fix the actual issues.
It is very easy to go for short term solutions and pay attention to convenient problems, but that will put you both in the same spot a few months down the line.
If you are confident that you understand where the marriage started to fall apart, the remedy is the same for every couple.
All you have to do is acknowledge and amend the problem.
The original love and trust will not appear instantaneously, but if you continue to treat the problem with time and attention, the intimacy will return.
At a high level, fixing a marriage sounds easier than it actually is.
If you are working to fix a marriage but aren’t seeing results, consider contacting a marriage coach for better results.
Coaching transforms millions of lives every year, and that is because everyone can benefit from direction and input.
Marriage coaches are experienced individuals who have one singular purpose, fixing your marriage.
Many couples may feel as though the problems they face are specific to them, but this is rarely the case.
Most couples are plagued with the same issues, whether it be jealousy, anxiety, bitterness, or anger.
By talking to a professional who has spoken to several other couples who have come out of these negative situations, you greatly improve your chances of fixing your marriage.
Coaching has saved countless relationships, but it is not a foolproof solution.
It is only when the couple comes in ready to be coached that everyone can work together to fix the problems plaguing a relationship.
Asking if relationship coaching is successful is like asking if football coaching is successful.
There are great marriage coaches and there are terrible marriage coaches.
Furthermore, even if the coaches are great, the team has to come in and put in the time and effort to produce results.
Marriage coaching online as a whole is a powerful service, but it is up to you to find the right coach and to be in the right mindset to accept change and take charge of your relationship.
Usually, the cost of marriage coaching online ranges from $75 to $300 per hour or session.
Depending on a marriage coach, the rates may be billed per hour, weekly, or even monthly. There are also coaches who offer packages and discounts for some of their sessions.
Coaching might be heavy on the pocket for some, but if you want to make a relationship work then this will all be worth it in the end.
This will be a good investment for you and for your partner as coaching will help you realign your goals together and understand how to work together harmoniously.