30 Ways To Let Go Of Someone You Love And Move Forward (2024)

Letting go of someone you love is difficult. This guide features 30 tips to help you let go of someone you love and move forward.

In my role as a life coach, I am often helping people discover what they really want from life and assisting them along their journey to getting there. 

That’s why I’m keen to share this guide with you.

Let’s roll!

When Should You Let Go Of Someone You Love?

Sometimes, love isn’t enough to fulfill you.

Perhaps your partner doesn’t fit in with the overall mission of your life. 

Maybe you love them, but this person keeps hurting you and ruining your self-esteem.

These are all reasons to leave someone even if you still love them

Of course, you should talk to them and see if it’s possible for them to fit into your dream life. By all means, give them a chance to show that they can.

But life has a time limit. If you want to live a great life and achieve all of your goals, sometimes you have to let go of unsuitable people, even if it hurts you to do so.    

The Reason Why We Can’t Let Go Of Someone Is Because Deep Inside We Still Hope

It’s good to keep faith in a partner being the person you need, up until a point. But you don’t want to be that person who waits more than twenty years for a partner to become the person you’re looking for. 

My guide on things to consider before a break-up will offer some practical advice on the best time to part ways with someone you love. 

Letting Go Of Someone You Love
Photo By Danie Franco On Unsplash

How To Let Go Of Someone You Love?

Here are steps that’ll make it easier to leave someone you love and move forward with your life.

1. Logically Decide What You Want From Your Life

It’s easy to get caught up in your emotions when thinking about parting with someone close to you. 

At this time, it’s better to leave your feelings out of your decision. Instead, logically decide what kind of person you want as your life partner. 

Does your partner match that description? If the logical answer is no, the truth is: you probably should have parted ways months ago. Remember that when you’re struggling to let go of this person. 

2. Let The Fantasy Go

You may have created the fantasy of a perfect future with this person. But if their personality or their desires don’t match this fantasy, it’ll never come true.

Related Content: Best Ways To Learn Acceptance And Letting Go

3. Break Up Face-To-Face

If you’re initiating the break-up, talk to your partner face-to-face. It’s the least they deserve and it’ll help give them the closure they need to stop chasing you.

4. Be Clear When You Break Up

Don’t give them a window to maybe get back together in the future, if this isn’t an option in your mind. Instead, be clear that this is the end. This will help give you both the closure needed to move on from a break-up.

An emotionally abusive partner might try to force you to change your mind. If they do, be strong, remember the past events that made you unhappy and focus on the relationship you really want during this conversation.  

Related Content: Effective Ways To Move On Without Closure

5. Give Yourself Time To Heal

Take a day to accept and be sad that this person won’t be in your life anymore. If you skip this healing process and hold in these feelings, they’re likely to weigh you down and affect your mental health for a few months or years.

That’s one day of crying and feeling sorry for yourself. A maximum of two. Then, you’ll start with this list of practical ways to move on from your relationship. 

It’s no good being emotionally unavailable for a few months, or mourning over a relationship that ended years ago. No self-help expert would recommend this. As tough as it might seem, it’s best to start moving on as quickly as you can.  

6. Forgive Them

If this person betrayed you, forgive them. Holding a grudge prevents you from moving forward with your life.

Related Content: Practical Tips On Letting Go Of Guilt & Forgive Yourself

7. Cut Off Contact

This makes it easier for both of you to move on once a relationship finishes.

8. Get Rid Of Things That Remind You Of Your Ex 

Another important step to help you move on after your romantic relationships come to an end.

9. Get Support From Friends And Family

It’s perfectly normal to feel some pain after a break-up. Holding your feelings in doesn’t help. If you’re having a hard time and need some support from your friends or a family member, don’t be afraid to ask for it. There’s nothing wrong with that. True friends will be happy to try and help you.

10. Seek Professional Help

A life coach, relationship coach or therapist will be able to help you process any feelings you have about your relationships, or any limiting beliefs you have about finding someone better.

11. Engage In Self-Care

If you’ve just got out of a relationship, this is the best time to treat yourself to the self-care activities that make you a happier person.

12. Dive Into Hobbies

It helps to look on the bright side of not being in a relationship. One of the advantages is that you’ll have more of your own time to spend on the hobbies that excite you.

13. Spend More Time With Friends And Family 

In a relationship, it’s common to spend more time with your partner and less with the other important people in your life. Now you’re single, this is your opportunity to spend time with other friends and family members. Make the most of it.

14. Keep Active, Keep Busy

It’s far better for your mental health than staying indoors being sad about your relationship.

15. Get A Makeover 

A post-break-up glow-up is a popular self-care strategy. This not only helps people feel better about themselves, but also ready for new life with a new partner. 

16. Try New Things

You’ll have extra time to yourself once your relationship comes to an end. Perhaps you could use this to start that hobby you always wanted to try.

17. Meditate

Meditation has a ton of mental and physical health benefits that lead to a more mindful and better life. After the break-up of a relationship, it can stop your mind from pining about your ex or worrying about the future. Check out this list of proven ways to empty your mind for more guidance. 

18. Learn The Lessons From Your Failed Relationship 

How could you have dealt with your relationship issues better? Asking yourself this will set you up for a better relationship in the future, instead of repeating your past mistakes. You can find profound meaning in all of your relationships when you do this. 

19. Journal

Writing helps you process your feelings and learn lessons from the events that happen in your life.  

20. Have Faith In The Universe

Spiritual and religious people believe that the universe has a plan for them, and that everything happens for their own good. This helps them get through tough times, even if that was a toxic relationship with an abusive partner. 

Related Content: Ways To Let Go And Trust The Universe

21. Use The Pain As A Catalyst

The pain of a failed relationship can be the same pain that motivates you to finally do what you really wanted with your life. Use this pain to fuel your bravery to escape the status quo and make that bold move you always wanted to make.

22. Trust The Process

Even if you take all of these steps to get on the right path to recovery, it can still take time to start feeling better after a relationship ends. There’s no magic pill to cure a broken heart. All you can do is trust the process and accept that you’ll be back on your feet eventually.

23. Get Back Out There When You’re Ready

The excitement of dating someone new can help you move on and finally accept a failed relationship. Don’t rush into the hunt for your next relationship until you feel ready though.   

Related: 121+ Let’s Get Deep Questions For Couples To Connect Again

Letting Go Of Someone You Love But Hurts You

You’ve just got out of a relationship characterised by love and pain? Here’s the most important thing to remember. 

24. Short-Term Pain Vs Long-Term Gain

A lot of people are scared to leave these types of relationships. They prefer the long-term pain of a partner who hurts them, rather than the intense short-term pain of breaking up.

Although it may not feel like it now, ending a relationship like this is the best way forward. This person wasn’t the right person for you. It might hurt now, but you’ve cleared the space to help you find a healthy relationship

How To Let Go Of Someone Who Doesn’t Want You

It can be extra-painful when someone leaves you, especially if you thought they were the perfect person to spend your life with. Here is my advice for people in this situation.

25. If They Don’t Want You, They’re Not Your Type

You may have thought this person was perfect for you. But if they don’t want you, you were wrong about that. You had tunnel vision. Surely the first thing on your relationship bucket list is a person who accepts you for who you are.

26. Stay Strong, Someone Else Is Out There

If this person isn’t your soulmate, that means your soulmate is still out there somewhere. You just need to be patient.

Related Content: Effective Ways How To Let Go Of Expectations

How To Let Go Of Someone You Love Who Doesn’t Love You

When love doesn’t go both ways, it makes sense to part ways. Here are some tips to help you do that.

27. Remember It’s Better To Have Loved And Lost 

The simple joys of being in love, the wonderful moments of sharing your lives together; it’s better to be upset about losing them than having never had them before. Perhaps you can choose to be grateful for having had these moments, rather than being sad that they’ve ended.

28. All Love Stories Have Ups And Downs

You might be in a down period now, but these are essential for your life. Without them, your up periods wouldn’t seem so momentous.  

29. Don’t Give Into Fear 

Fear keeps people in bad relationships. It prevents single men and women from seeking new relationships. Don’t be that person that lets fear ruin your own life, in either of these scenarios.

30. You’ll Probably Suffer From Multiple Heartbreaks

If you suffer your first heartbreak at a very young age, it can feel like the end of the world.

But the chances are: you’ll feel this intense sense of attachment to several people through your life – and you’ll probably have your heart broken several times. 

People break up all the time,  most relationships end in heartbreak, but the good times are worth the pain. 

It hurts every time, but at least as you get older, you realise you have it in you to recover and find someone new. This might not be one of the most positive things you’ve heard about love, but perhaps it’s something to hold on to if this is the first person who ever broke your heart. 

Can You Still Love Someone And Let Them Go?

It’s possible to love someone, let them go and for that to still be the right decision. Perhaps, logically this person still doesn’t fit in with the desired future direction of your life.

Love Someone
Photo By Liza Summer On Pexels

You might have to dig deep to let this person out of your life and you’ll probably feel anxious about doing so. But, sometimes your life mission is more important. 

It might sound like counter-intuitive advice, but sometimes you have to let go of a great person to find your perfect life partner. 

Letting Go Is Hard

Break-ups aren’t easy. It will always hurt our feelings to say goodbye to someone who was close to us. That’s a truth of human psychology we all share.

My heart goes out to you if you’re going through this right now, but I know you’ve got the strength and personal power to recover and move forward.  

Any Questions On This Topic? 

Thanks for reading my blog post. I love writing practical articles that help people in these elements of their lives.

If you have any questions about this topic, feel free to leave a comment below. I’d be excited to leave an answer.

It would be great to talk with you.

About The Author

Bijan Kholghi is a certified life coach with the Milton Erickson Institute Heidelberg (Germany). He helps clients and couples reach breakthroughs in their lives by changing subconscious patterns. His solution-oriented approach is based on Systemic- and Hypnotherapy.