23 Best Ways – How To Find The Man Of Your Dreams (2024)

Let’s be honest, the perfect man doesn’t exist. The perfect woman doesn’t either. Everyone has “flaws”. You’ll know he’s the right man for you though, because it will feel perfect.

There are steps that you can take to greatly improve your chances of finding your dream guy. It may even turn out that finding him may have more to do with you than the man.

Read on to learn these ways for how to find the man of your dreams.

Let’s dive right into it.

How To Find The Man Of Your Dreams

1. Understand Yourself

Know your own real needs and distinguish them from other people’s expectations. You’ll be much more ready to meet someone else once you do this.

Though personal growth is a lifelong process, if you’re struggling to figure out who you are, it’ll truly be much more difficult to figure out what you really want in a relationship and that’s the main point.

2. Be Aware Of Your Flaws

Being aware and ready to address your own flaws, will also make you more ready to address issues that can arise in a relationship. If you’re convinced you’re perfect, you’ll be much less likely to compromise.

3. Don’t Expect Perfection

Everyone’s idea of perfection is different, so If you’re looking for a 100% perfect man, you’ll never find him. No one is perfect.

You’re not one of those women who’s at the point of just settling for someone. Rather, you’re about understanding the qualities that are really important to you and which things you can overlook.

4. Be Comfortable Being Alone

Be content with your own company before you begin your search. Women used to hold onto the myth of finding the man who completes you or makes you whole. 

Change that so you already feel like a fulfilled, well-rounded being, whose life will be improved by the presence of the right man, but not completed.

5. Find Meaning In Your Own Life

Through your friendships, work, and outside interests, find out what is your purpose. Then you’ll be a woman who is happy on her own yet ready for commitment or marriage.

If you spend all of your free time with friends or family, you are much more likely to be codependent.

6. Love Who You Are

This is being confident and happy with who you are and what you have to offer. If you don’t love yourself, how can you expect someone else to?

Being aware of your flaws is part of loving yourself, and it will make you much more grounded in all relationships.

7. Gain Some Experience

Need to know your dating style? Go on dates with various men to totally understand your real expectations in a relationship.

Not to say, dates with guys you obviously don’t like just to gain some experience, but think about being open-minded while dating various men, even if it means totally stepping out of your comfort zone a bit.

8. Define The Qualities Of Your Dream Guy

Without making these qualities read like a check-list that has to be completed for you to find the right guy, but strongly consider which ones are a must-have for you as a husband.

It helps to know what your own core values are and how strongly you stand for them.

9. Define Your Deal Breakers

The qualities in men you don’t want can be just as important as the ones you do want. Maybe there are a few deal breakers that mean you can’t make a relationship work, no matter how hard you try.

It’s better to be honest about what they are up front than to try to stick it out before failing.

10. Be Ready To Compromise

Stand your ground on things that are really important to you, and be on alert for red flags that tell you that the relationship won’t work.

However, keep an open mind when you start dating, even if your “have” and “have not” list is firmly ingrained in your mind.

When you meet the right one, you may find that you didn’t even know exactly what you were looking for.

As long as both of you make each other happy and fulfill most of each others’ needs, you’re off to a great start.

11. Know Where To Look 

Be open to love no matter where you go, because ultimately, no one can predict where you’ll find the one who could be your future husband. 

Knowing where to look can greatly improve your chances of meeting him.

12. Be The Person You Want To Marry 

To attract the kind of person you like, you deserve to have those traits too. Also, look at complementary traits.

Maybe you’re very domestic, for example. You might be happier with someone who doesn’t putter in your kitchen, although he never gripes about mowing the lawn or cleaning the gutters.

For a marriage to work, it would help to share some qualities. He can bring out your best, without forcing a whole new personality on you.

13. Follow Your Interests

Find a hobby or two that makes you stand out. Women who surround themselves with a community of people with the same interests increase their chances to find someone while having fun at the same time.

Focus On Yourself
Photo by Paul Gilmore on Unsplash

14. Let The Ex-boyfriends Go

If you maintain some semblance of contact with ex-boyfriends, you might decide to cut that cord.

Many keep in touch with an ex because there are codependency issues, others like to keep a fall back option, while others love the attention. Of course, all these reasons are the wrong reasons to have an ex in your life.

If he’s not a genuine friend, someone you can count on, then there’s really no reason to keep him around. 

Related: Clear Signs Your Ex Is Pretending To Be Over You

15. Refuse The Urge To Pretend To Be Someone Else

If you’re going to find the right man, it’s your work to maintain your own integrity and be the woman you know you are. It’s the only way to begin a good relationship.

Being inauthentic is starting relationships built on a lie and that’s not what you really deserve.

16. Dress To Make You Feel Good

There’s no sense trying to dress for what you think men would like. Dress for yourself.

Dress in a way that makes you feel most comfortable and confident. He won’t appear if you’re making inauthentic moves with decisions for yourself.

17. Think Positively

This is similar to self-confidence, but a little different. Here you choose to start talking to yourself in a positive way.

Build up your self-esteem through affirmations about yourself. Once you feel the energy waves soaring, use that same energy and spread it out into the world by doing something nice for someone.

Compassionate acts toward others will bring him closer to you too. It’s great for your entire body, mind, and spirit – and that of the universe.

18. Conjure Him Up

Visualize the type of man you want right before you fall asleep. Try some good habits like lighting candles or incense, playing music or meditating.

Build him up in your subconscious so that he can appear in your life. This takes time and practice, even some patience. 

19. Don’t Look, Yet Look

You don’t have to look too hard and seem desperate if you are doing all the right things. Let it go.

He will come, without being overly confident, and without being so vain to think that he will just appear at your door out of nowhere.

20. Don’t Be Desperate

No matter how beautiful and charming you are, if men see that you’re desperate, they’ll head the other way.

If you do come off as desperate, it really means you haven’t done important and valuable work on yourself.

21. Be Humble

You’re a smart, successful and attractive woman, however pride will raise all the red flags. Regardless of your level of success, let him find out and see it himself.

By all means, tell him what you do, just let the successes come out subtly over time. After all, how do you feel about men who are proud and boastful?

22. Work On Your Discernment

Without discernment, you may be together for years without even realizing he’s been the one all along. You might be just friends or even grew up together.

Other times, he may have everything you thought you wanted, yet he’s not the right one. Best advice is to listen to that small voice inside all of us to help you discern what’s true for you.

23. Believe

Stronger than anything is faith. If you believe something you can make it a reality.

Believing will increase your vibration and your chances of encountering him, perhaps sooner than you had anticipated. Don’t doubt for a second that he’s out there, floating around the universe, preparing to meet you, too.

How Do I Attract The Man Of My Dreams?

Being confident in your needs and desires is most important. Know every single little detail.

Once you know his traits and you can see him clearly, visualize this person right before you fall asleep. You could see yourself talking to him or out to dinner with him. 

How does this man talk to you? What does his laugh sound like? Pay attention to what it feels like to be with him.

If you believe something and feel it in your reality, it will happen. Finally, remember to feel grateful before it even happens.

How Can I Find My Dream Boy?

Here’s some advice with tips on how to find the perfect boyfriend.

  • Let go of your mental images and decide what qualities in a boyfriend are most important to you.
  • Let go of whatever personal rules are blocking you from seeing the best in that special someone.
  • Be in touch with who you are; your core values, temperament, beliefs, strengths and weaknesses.
  • Love yourself no matter what, so you can truly be free to love others.
  • Get out there and mingle, make friends and socialize. He will not likely just show up at your front door.
  • Always be true to yourself. The right guy will love you for who you are, pretending will make you lose him.
  • Stay calm without acting desperate. Desperation is a total turn off for most guys.
  • First impressions count. The way you dress should represent your core values. Keep it fun and simple.
  • Discernment is a valuable skill to hone. Without it, you might miss him being in your life already.

How Do I Find My Dream Partner?

Thinking you can move right along and not deal with things from the past will get you in a hot mess faster than you know.

Clean up your table, your closet, and reorganise your suitcase because your dream partner surely wouldn’t like to deal with all that extra baggage.

Ex partners are another thing to clear out. If you maintain some semblance of contact with them, it could be time to finally cut that cord.

If it’s not a genuine friend, someone you can count on, then there’s no reason to keep them around. Plus, having an ex around can make even the most secure people feel even a little awkward.

How Can You Find Someone Of Your Dreams?

In truth, you don’t have to look too hard if you’re doing the right things to attract him.

He will come, however don’t be overly confident, and don’t be so vain to think that he will just appear out of nowhere.

Be proactive. Be out in your community, keeping your eyes peeled, aware of your surroundings and in touch with signs.

Be present with your daily actions and activities so you don’t miss any indicator that he might be nearby. If you need more guidance, ask the universe to help you.

Sometimes it happens when you least expect it. 

How To Attract The Man Of Your Dreams, Law Of Attraction

With the Law of Attraction, you create every aspect of your reality. Regardless of your situation now, you deserve better.

Manifesting a relationship with the right person is easier than you might think. Once you get past feelings of loneliness, heartache, or limiting beliefs, the process is quite simple and fast.

Here are some tips that can help:

  • Be Confident 

Realize you’re a great person and it doesn’t matter what others think.

  • Focus On The Positive

Flip any negative thoughts to positive ones.

  • Love Without Fear Of Getting Hurt

If you’re afraid of getting hurt, you might unconsciously be preventing someone from getting as close to you as you want. 

  • Have Fun

When you’re having a good time, others notice and want to be with you.

  • See The Good Things

Visualize the good things about the specific person you want in your life.

  • Appreciate The Contrast

Be happy in the moment, the things you want will start falling in place, including your love life.

  • Be Willing To Let The Other Person Go 

When you are okay with not being with them, you open the path for the Law of Attraction to bring your specific person to you.

How To Meet The Man Of Your Dreams

Despite what has become a common belief, most women don’t really find boyfriends in bars. In fact, according to a study by Match.com, only 7 percent of all bar hoppers will come across long term relationship-worthy men while grabbing a cocktail.

You can look online or be set up by friends, but many people have found love within the community that caters to their hobbies or interests.

Here are a few ideas:

  • Home Improvement Store – to find Mr. Fix it
  • Flea Market – looking among the vintage goods
  • Bike Shop – an athletic guy who likes to explore
  • Pet Store – a fellow pet lover and responsible and caring
  • Museum – a cultured man
  • Organic Market – a sexy man who cares about what goes into his body
  • Driving Range – likes golf too

How To Get The Man Of Your Dreams

Start by knowing yourself and knowing what you are looking for. Once you do that, you can place yourself in environments that will help you find your dream guy or get the attention of that guy you have had your eye on.

  • Flirt With Him

Flirting is a good way to get a man’s attention and let him know you’re interested. Make eye contact for several seconds, smile, give compliments, lean forward when conversing, and mimic his body language.

  • Start A Conversation

Think of some questions you can ask to start the conversation in case you feel nervous when you meet a new man.

This helps you appear more confident. Ask open-ended questions to get the conversation going. 

  • Ask Him For A First Date

There’s nothing wrong with being proactive and asking out the dream man you’re interested in. Avoid saying, “Do you feel like dating?” It’s better to be clear that you’re interested and suggest a specific activity instead.

Keep the date light and casual. Ask him, “Hey, do you want to grab coffee one day?” or “Do you want to check out this new exhibit on Saturday?”

Ask him what he did the past weekend and suggest you do some similar activity. This way your date is based on something you’re both interested in.

  • Always Be You

Don’t compromise yourself. Never change your beliefs, goals, or values for anyone you’re dating.

If the man doesn’t accept you for who you are, he is not the right one. Long term relationships last when you’re honest about who you are and communicate your wants and needs.

  • Keep Your Cool

Don’t overthink things. Keep every date and interaction in perspective.

Remind yourself that it’s only a first date or a conversation, not a life or death situation.

When You Meet The Man Of Your Dreams

It can seem surreal when you’ve met the man you’ve been dreaming of, especially if you’ve been waiting a long time.

Here are some things to expect, so you don’t lose your head.

  • Your feelings may surprise you, yet they’ll feel absolutely right at the same time.
  • Your attraction/feelings continue to grow deeper each time the two of you talk.
  • You talk about the future without a disclaimer or any “if we’re still together” statements.
  • You’re each truly interested in how you’re each feeling.
  • Your bond is strong enough to endure an argument – you’ll feel safe with open communication.
  • You’ll share the same goals and vision for the future.
  • You’ll no longer tolerate others who threaten your relationship.

Avoid a codependent relationship. This can bring out the worst in both partners and shatters lives. 

Of course, you’ve done the required work on yourself first, so surely this won’t be a concern.
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About The Author

Bijan Kholghi is a certified life coach with the Milton Erickson Institute Heidelberg (Germany). He helps clients and couples reach breakthroughs in their lives by changing subconscious patterns. His solution-oriented approach is based on Systemic- and Hypnotherapy.