22 BEST Ways to Deal with a Crazy Wife (2024)

Let’s talk about dealing with a ‘crazy’ wife.

In my role as a life coach, I am often helping people improve at understanding and communicating with their loved ones.

That’s why I’m keen to discuss this topic with you.

Let’s dive right into it.

Is Your Wife ‘Crazy’?

The term ‘crazy’ is often overused and exaggerated, so let’s begin by establishing what’s going on in your marriage.

Crazy Wife
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Wife Has Gone Crazy

Are you saying your wife has lost her mind? She’s deranged? She’s a danger to herself and others around her? This is the true definition of ‘crazy’, in which case you need assistance from a clinical psychologist.

Wife Is Acting Crazy

This is a term often harshly and mistakenly used when someone’s wife is having severe mood swings. If your wife is quick to lose her temper or become very upset? We’ll explore how to deal with this below.

Wife Is Driving Me Crazy 

This is a more sensitive way of phrasing it, as it puts the focus on you rather than her. Yes, it can be difficult to deal with severe mood swings, especially if you don’t understand why they’re occurring. So, let’s explore how to address the situation now.

How To Deal With A ‘Crazy’ Wife 

Below, I’ve listed 22 ideas that should help you restore parity in your marriage.

1. Diagnose 

The first thing to do is to take stock of what’s wrong. Is she actually ‘crazy’? Does she have a mental illness? Do you need a clinical psychologist, or is this something you can figure out alone? In most cases, it will be the latter.

2. Don’t Call Her ‘Crazy’

This shows a lack of empathy and understanding to her situation, and she may take offense. It’s only going to make the problem worse.

3. Keep A Cool Head

Even if she’s being incredibly emotional, fighting fire with fire won’t help. If you can keep your cool while talking about your issues, this will stop her emotions from escalating further.

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4. Remain Rational   

Throughout arguments, it’s common for the angry person to resort to irrational statements and harsh words. Keep things on track by remaining rational as you talk to her.

5. Discover The Root Cause

Ask her what’s making her act so differently. Keep an open mind as far as what she says. Don’t jump in to argue your point just yet. Seek first to understand then to be understood.

6. Listen To Understand, Not To Reply 

Engage in active listening. If your wife feels heard, that should really help to calm her down. She might hurt your feelings. You might want to jump in and point fingers at what she’s done wrong. As tempting as that might be, it’s better to wait until she’s said everything she wants to say.

7. Take Some Time For Introspection

If your ‘crazy’ wife blames you for her erratic moods, it might feel natural for you to deny all of her accusations. Indeed, that’s what leads to accusations such as “my wife is crazy”. A more progressive step is to take your time to consider what she said and really have a good think about what you’re willing to do to be a better husband. 

8. Share Your Honest Feelings

Once she’s finished talking and you’ve had time to consider it, share your honest feelings about how her so-called ‘crazy’ outbursts make you feel. Work together to decide how you can both prevent them from happening again in future.

9. Establish Boundaries And Ground Rules  

During these calm discussions, it’s a good time to start talking about boundaries for her behavior in future. If you continue to accept her ‘crazy wife’ outbursts, they’ll often continue to occur. So, establish what behavior you will accept and what’s going to happen if she crosses the line. Of course, this should be done in a loving way, which your wife accepts and agrees with.

10. Be Ready To Lose Some Battles

It may occur that your wife starts to get a little crazy over some things you don’t agree with. Even so, it’s sometimes better to let it slide. That’s what compromise is about in a marriage. Sometimes, it’s better to let her win a battle if it means winning the overall war of a more peaceful marriage.

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11. Take Care Of Her Responsibilities

If she’s going through a stressful time because of something outside your relationship, consider lifting some of the weight off her shoulders as far as household responsibilities.

On top of that, cook her a nice meal or run her a bubble bath. These minor things can do a lot to help her to de-stress. More importantly, they show you care, so she’ll hopefully be less likely to take out her external stresses on you.

If she’s going crazy due to your lack of help around the house, that’s another reason to start pitching in. It’s part of being a family to help each other through the stresses of life. 

12. Distract Her

A night in with her favorite movie. A trip to her favorite restaurant with her best friends. A family getaway to some cool faraway location. Do your best to be the good guy that makes her forget her problems, rather than the ‘crazy husband’ who causes them.

13. Spend Quality Time With Her

Oftentimes, when a ‘crazy wife’ is nagging about irrational things, it’s a cry for attention. In many cases, she simply wants to feel seen and heard. You can often help to eliminate a lot of the crazy nagging behavior in a relationship by spending time with her and making her feel like a queen.

14. Reassure Her That You Love Her

Love conquers all. Most marital problems can be overcome when there’s enough love in the relationship. It’ll never hurt for a woman to hear that their man loves them. Just make sure you’re working on showing it, as well as saying it. 

15. Be More Transparent

If your wife wants to know more about what you’re doing when she’s not around, don’t be afraid to tell her. Yes, it can be annoying to check in with your wife every so often. But, if it helps to ease her fears, it’s surely a sacrifice worth making.

16. Be Proactive   

Let’s try and break the cycle of her getting upset and you fixing the situation. Be proactive – and think of ways to make your wife happy ahead of time. This way, you avoid having to deal with a crazy wife altogether.

17. Don’t Be Offensive

When things get heated during arguments, it can be tempting to resort to calling names, passive-aggressiveness or putting each other down. It might help you to feel better in the moment. At the same time, it does nothing to solve your relationship problems in the long term.

18. Don’t Bury Your Head In The Sand

If you have a ‘crazy wife’, don’t hide from the problems. Don’t try and numb yourself with booze or anything else. Admit your relationship needs work and step up to the challenge. If things get tough for you, don’t hesitate to confide in friends or family members for support. 

19. Work With A Professional

If you’re struggling to reach a compromise in any of your discussions, consider bringing in a couples counselor. They can work as an intermediary to help you have a productive conversation without it descending into chaos.

20. Curb Your Feelings Of Resentment

If your wife is making your life tough, it’s perfectly normal to feel a bit of resentment. But, again,  this isn’t helpful to fixing your relationship. Be strong. Try to have empathy and focus on fixing how she’s feeling.

21. Don’t Give Up 

Remember why you married this woman in the first place. This is still an amazing woman who’s struggling with her mental health. When you married this person, you promised to love her in sickness and health. Don’t give up on her now.

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22. Be Patient 

When you’re in the middle of a tough period of your relationship, it can feel like such a very long time. It might seem like this period of your life will never end. But these tough moments will pass, especially if you put in the work to fix them. Before you know it, this will be a thing of the past long ago. Your relationship can still thrive in spite of these choppy waters. 

Frequently Asked Questions Relating To: “Is My Wife Crazy”

Is My Wife Crazy
Photo By tirachardz On freepik

I’d like to round off the article with the answers to some frequently asked questions surrounding women and mental health.

Why Are Women More Emotional Than Men? 

It’s a defining aspect of femininity for women to be more connected to their emotions than men. This brings lots of positive qualities, particularly in family life. It makes mothers naturally fantastic at caring and nurturing for their kids, for example.

It’s common for the female reproductive system to have a stronger impact on their mood than men. This system is constantly going through changes and it can sometimes be difficult to cope with. This is particuarly true during times of dramatic change, such as pregnancy or menopause.    

Wife Acting Crazy During Pregnancy

Pregnancy takes a huge toll on the female body and their hormones. The whole thing can be extremely unnerving to deal with. It’s only natural for this to result in mood swings. When you also consider the physical symptoms of pregnancy, it’s perfectly natural to expect a woman might have a few emotional ’off’ days during this part of her life. 

Why Is My Wife Crazy After Having A Baby? 

It’s not just the physical toll of giving birth. Having a baby is very stressful. It’s tough to adapt to family life. Post-partum depression is a mental illness that’s also a risk. 

Just because you’re adapting well to fatherhood, it doesn’t mean your partner should be expected to be dealing with family life just as well.  

Why Is My Wife Crazy During Menopause? 

Menopause is another time of great hormonal change, which brings a lot of unpleasant symptoms.

These include mood swings, hot flashes and weight gain. As a husband, it’s your job to realize and respect that isn’t the easiest time in a woman’s life. It can cause mental health issues, even if all other parts of her life are going swimmingly. 

Should I Leave My Crazy Wife?

It would be naive to suggest that divorcing your wife isn’t an option in modern society. Still, I’d recommend reading this guide on things to consider before bailing on your relationship, before you pull the trigger.   

Any More Questions Regarding Women And Mental Health?

Thanks for reading my guide on dealing with a ‘crazy’ wife. I hope it helps you make positive strides in your marriage. Good luck!

If you have any questions or would simply like to leave some positive feedback, feel free to use the comments section below. 

It would be great to talk further on this topic.

About The Author

Bijan Kholghi is a certified life coach with the Milton Erickson Institute Heidelberg (Germany). He helps clients and couples reach breakthroughs in their lives by changing subconscious patterns. His solution-oriented approach is based on Systemic- and Hypnotherapy.

Bijan